First about the Donkey! EC was teaching me to copy and paste pics to my blog. For some reason he Googled donkey images to use as an example. I'm going to assume this was not some deviously creative way of calling me an ass. Anyway we both got a chuckle out of it and I've decided to leave him there as my mascot! It looks like birds are building nests on him-I wonder if he's noticed.
Back to our story still in progress:
When we last visited our red-neck Ozark mountain hideaway- oops, I mean our weekend house in the Finger Lakes with our crew of suburban teenagers ,we were enjoying the gentle ping of BBs on aluminium (it sounds even better if you say ah-loo-min-ium like they do in England). The pinging gave way to the roar of the dirtbikes creating a lovely time trial racing vista in the back forty. Hard to believe I wasn't outside soaking up the entertainment isn't it? Actually I was enjoying a new personal ritual called washing two meals worth of dishes for eight people-by hand! Now you can see how easy my choice was shooting/dirtbikes or washing 10,000 dishes. We needed something to eat our next meal off of and I couldn't throw everything away and buy new like my brother's college roomates. I do have a dishwasher -this isn't the Ozarks yo, however due to water leaking beyond our control it was necessary to either pull it out to fix it or disconnect it. Given the looks of the dishwasher and the fact that if we were lucky we would only find bones of past vermin it seemed the safer thing to just disconnect it. Also- both of us shoddied not doing it(shoddy not is teenager for "Dude, I am so not doing that !") By the time I had completed the dishes it was time to feed the masses again-what a rollercoaster!
After dinner,which only had a little bit of food launched about the diningroom (none of it into the fan for a change) The boys continued to come up with new ways to amuse themselves and attract law enforcement. EC decided they should kayak across the river(still partially frozen) and build a fort to sleep in. Personally, 12 degrees is not camping weather in my opinion and the boys(except EC) agreed. EC insisted he would keep a fire going all night. This really underscored the beauty of the plan. The other side of the river is actually private property and I'm sure no one would notice the fire burning and call the police. What a wonderful way to stay out of trouble don't you think? Fortunately, EC was convinced (barely) that a night in a warm bed would be a better plan and went to bed right away because he was pissed at everyone.
Tomorrow-Ski/Boarding at Bristol Mountain !
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Three Day Testosterone Challenge Part 2
I know you've been on pins and needles wondering what happened next and to whom it happened. And weirdly enough I thought I typed all that already. I even went back to my posts and there's no sign of it. Maybe I'm dreaming about blogging now!
Anyway, it was MUD and I. I was well into my hibernation cycle when I awoke to feel the bed shaking. There was MUD shoving the lower right corner of our four poster bedframe around with his knee ! I wondered out loud what he was doing and just as he tried to explain himself we hear a snap and the right corner of the mattress drops to the floor! Our bed is close to three feet off the floor(I actually use a stepstool to get in) so this was quite a shock for both of us. I immediately volunteered to sleep on the couch-basically I just wanted to go back to sleep before it actually got light. But no, The Husband proceeded to direct me on how to take the bed apart and I proceeded not to understand what the hell he wanted me to do. Finally in fit of frustration (a legit fit) he tore the other side of the frame off and we dropped to the floor. Since the situation was resolved we threw ourselves back in bed and slept among the ruins until mid morning.
Ah morning! We awoke on the floor (naturally) with the headboard slanting ominously over our heads and the frame sides at eye level . This proved to be the easiest part of the day. The bed was not actually broken and later in the day, with the help of two of EC's friends we were able to put Humpty Dumpty together again. Amazingly there were no snide comments about how the bed fell in the first place-but you could tell they were thinking it ( and that vision undoubtedly rendered them speechless).
While Husband set about fixing the plumbing himself, I set out a lovely breakfast buffet for our guests. Upon waking our guests were dismayed to learn that the plumbing fairies had not appeared while they were sleeping and they still had to chip ice to get water to flush doodies. This did not go over well but since it was a 5 hour ride home and they had no car it was really tough noogies! Water was gotten, doodies were flushed and there was much rejoicing.
While I grocery shopped and The Husband tried to solve our other issues the boys escaped the house and headed for the barn. The barn is full of the "goodies". If you can drive it shoot it or make something to shoot , it's in there! When I got home from the store the dirt bikes were gone,the Trans Am was gone and someone had emptied the recycling bin onto the lawn! I was only gone an hour for crying out loud ! At least The Husband had the Trans Am .
The recycling was not just on the ground, but carefully placed on various pedestals in order to be shot at. Unbeknownst to Husband and I, a BB gun had been smuggled into our tightly packed vehicle (and you wonder how they used to get weapons on planes!). Someone must have been hiding that baby up their butt that's all I have to say!!! We now had two BB guns counting the one that we keep in the barn.
Since MUD was under considerable plumbing stress I am going to try to overlook what happened next. EC was given permission by MUD to purchase, with his own dough, a BB gun at Dicks Sporting Goods. Not sure what the hell had transpired (and why EC had any money left in his bank account) I actually heard myself volunteer to take FOUR teenage boys to purchase a gun ! It was almost an out of body experience-it was clearly an out of my mind experience! I will say the trip to Dick's had it's practical side. The minute we got to Dick's half of us headed to guns and ammo and half to the bathroom, then we switched ( as you may have guessed some people did not want to bring their own flush water up from the river). We left quickly, before the gaseous cloud overtook the entire store. I read in the paper that the place was condemned for unsanitary conditions later in the day. Employees were treated at Auburn Hospital for gas inhalation and released.
I read this of course while listening to the relaxing pitter-patter of BB's hitting aluminum cans and the sound ammo being reloaded-Delightful
Anyway, it was MUD and I. I was well into my hibernation cycle when I awoke to feel the bed shaking. There was MUD shoving the lower right corner of our four poster bedframe around with his knee ! I wondered out loud what he was doing and just as he tried to explain himself we hear a snap and the right corner of the mattress drops to the floor! Our bed is close to three feet off the floor(I actually use a stepstool to get in) so this was quite a shock for both of us. I immediately volunteered to sleep on the couch-basically I just wanted to go back to sleep before it actually got light. But no, The Husband proceeded to direct me on how to take the bed apart and I proceeded not to understand what the hell he wanted me to do. Finally in fit of frustration (a legit fit) he tore the other side of the frame off and we dropped to the floor. Since the situation was resolved we threw ourselves back in bed and slept among the ruins until mid morning.
Ah morning! We awoke on the floor (naturally) with the headboard slanting ominously over our heads and the frame sides at eye level . This proved to be the easiest part of the day. The bed was not actually broken and later in the day, with the help of two of EC's friends we were able to put Humpty Dumpty together again. Amazingly there were no snide comments about how the bed fell in the first place-but you could tell they were thinking it ( and that vision undoubtedly rendered them speechless).
While Husband set about fixing the plumbing himself, I set out a lovely breakfast buffet for our guests. Upon waking our guests were dismayed to learn that the plumbing fairies had not appeared while they were sleeping and they still had to chip ice to get water to flush doodies. This did not go over well but since it was a 5 hour ride home and they had no car it was really tough noogies! Water was gotten, doodies were flushed and there was much rejoicing.
While I grocery shopped and The Husband tried to solve our other issues the boys escaped the house and headed for the barn. The barn is full of the "goodies". If you can drive it shoot it or make something to shoot , it's in there! When I got home from the store the dirt bikes were gone,the Trans Am was gone and someone had emptied the recycling bin onto the lawn! I was only gone an hour for crying out loud ! At least The Husband had the Trans Am .
The recycling was not just on the ground, but carefully placed on various pedestals in order to be shot at. Unbeknownst to Husband and I, a BB gun had been smuggled into our tightly packed vehicle (and you wonder how they used to get weapons on planes!). Someone must have been hiding that baby up their butt that's all I have to say!!! We now had two BB guns counting the one that we keep in the barn.
Since MUD was under considerable plumbing stress I am going to try to overlook what happened next. EC was given permission by MUD to purchase, with his own dough, a BB gun at Dicks Sporting Goods. Not sure what the hell had transpired (and why EC had any money left in his bank account) I actually heard myself volunteer to take FOUR teenage boys to purchase a gun ! It was almost an out of body experience-it was clearly an out of my mind experience! I will say the trip to Dick's had it's practical side. The minute we got to Dick's half of us headed to guns and ammo and half to the bathroom, then we switched ( as you may have guessed some people did not want to bring their own flush water up from the river). We left quickly, before the gaseous cloud overtook the entire store. I read in the paper that the place was condemned for unsanitary conditions later in the day. Employees were treated at Auburn Hospital for gas inhalation and released.
I read this of course while listening to the relaxing pitter-patter of BB's hitting aluminum cans and the sound ammo being reloaded-Delightful
Friday, February 20, 2009
Three Day Testosterone Challenge Part 1
For those of you that don't know-over Valentine's weekend my family went to our house in Central NY. I know -you're thinking, how relaxing , romantic and cozy. And you would've been right except for one thing or rather 6 things we took and 2 we got when we got there.
A week before we left, my beloved signifigant other (who shall be henceforth referred to as MUD) announced to all of EC's friends we were headed to NY and wanted to know who was going. I'm not saying that this was wrong but there were 5 boys sitting there and I hadn't even mentioned it to EC who was out at his ice rink! Also, YC was already taking 1 friend. The car holds 8 if everyone brings only a tooth brush ,deoderant and changes of underwear. Alas it's winter and we were going ski/boarding! After much back and forth we ended up with a car load of 6 boys ages 12-18 , a stuffed rear luggage rack and crap at everyone's feet and on everyone's lap and stuff on the roof ! At least the car battery and BB gun(1) stayed home. Needless to say it was a cozy 5 hour ride up. Actually everyone did quite well although there we're some complains regarding heads blocking the DVD and people leaning on each other. At least no one farted(a huge suprise given the beef jerky and fast food consumption)! MUD even drove the whole way without falling asleep-thanks Red Bull !!!
We arrived not too late at night and the house was still standing and functioning -until we turned on the water. Not like it wasn't expected, but we'd just had a bunch of stuff redone so this wouldn't happen again ! After sopping up the water and telling the boys they had to go out in 12 degree weather, to the (partially frozen) river, chip through the ice and bring back 2 buckets of water so they could flush after pooping (they actually threatened to crap in the neighbors yard to avoid getting buckets of water) we settled in to our beds to await the next days adventure. Some of us didn't need to wait that long!
A week before we left, my beloved signifigant other (who shall be henceforth referred to as MUD) announced to all of EC's friends we were headed to NY and wanted to know who was going. I'm not saying that this was wrong but there were 5 boys sitting there and I hadn't even mentioned it to EC who was out at his ice rink! Also, YC was already taking 1 friend. The car holds 8 if everyone brings only a tooth brush ,deoderant and changes of underwear. Alas it's winter and we were going ski/boarding! After much back and forth we ended up with a car load of 6 boys ages 12-18 , a stuffed rear luggage rack and crap at everyone's feet and on everyone's lap and stuff on the roof ! At least the car battery and BB gun(1) stayed home. Needless to say it was a cozy 5 hour ride up. Actually everyone did quite well although there we're some complains regarding heads blocking the DVD and people leaning on each other. At least no one farted(a huge suprise given the beef jerky and fast food consumption)! MUD even drove the whole way without falling asleep-thanks Red Bull !!!
We arrived not too late at night and the house was still standing and functioning -until we turned on the water. Not like it wasn't expected, but we'd just had a bunch of stuff redone so this wouldn't happen again ! After sopping up the water and telling the boys they had to go out in 12 degree weather, to the (partially frozen) river, chip through the ice and bring back 2 buckets of water so they could flush after pooping (they actually threatened to crap in the neighbors yard to avoid getting buckets of water) we settled in to our beds to await the next days adventure. Some of us didn't need to wait that long!
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