Post from a small village in Russia

Now, I know what you're thinking. She is not in Russia! You know this because my Profile says I live in Pennsylvania. I also have a non-working right ACL which means I am not skiing,which is the only reason I would go to Russia in the first place.

I know I am not in Russia because I have running water, vodka is not considered a legitimate blood thinner (I confirmed this during my pre-op testing) and if a nurse asks the average person which hand is the good one( to not take blood from) they do not answer:" the one I use to hold my vodka"! Alright so I answered that but I couldn't help it, it was too irreverent to go to waste.

But Listen up PECO Energy!!!!!

There is no excuse for the electricity going off everytime it rains like some freakin' third world country. The frequency with which our power goes on off is is on par with the number of DUI's that Lindsey Lohan has racked up (maybe she's driving around drunk hitting our poles!). We are not talking thunderstorms,hurricanes or tornadoes here! We are talking about plain old rain-gentle plant loving rain, rain for singing in, rain that ducks like. Maybe one of your highly skilled technicians needs to screw the covers on the boxes tighter of replace the waterproof seals. Maybe you could just tape a nice plastic bag over the box-that would keep the water out until you geniuses figure out how to fix this!!

I do not wish to pay several hundred dollars every month for half cooked food and carpal tunnel syndrome from resetting the clocks every fifteen minutes! In fact I am going to start sending you some of my bills so you can pay them!

First I'll be sending you my bills for new versions of every appliance you kill with a power surge!

These may include but are not exclusive to plasma TVs, computers and the rechargeable taser I use to keep the kids in line (just kidding I use a hockey stick).

The next bills are from my dog's shrink,cardiologist and regular vet. My poor follicley challenged Norwegian Elkhound (the "elkhound patterned baldness" is not PECO's fault but I'm still pissed) has a heart attack everytime the power goes on and off. Today the beeping and whirring drove the poor dog out the back door into the pouring rain-the dog hates the rain. He's actually been known to hold his pee for 24 hrs rather than go outside in the rain. This will take years of therapy to fix-pretty soon he's going to freak out everytime we turn a lamp off. He already runs when the coffee maker beeps (why 5 times- dude, no one is that asleep!).

My final bill is from the hairdresser who had to fix the mess on my head that happened when I could no longer time how long the dye was on my hair-not everyone looks good with short hair that appears to have been broken off like icicles.

The above things did not actually happen (except the poor dog) but had this been an actual emergency-oh yeah we wouldn't know 'cause the power was off!!!!
WHO MOVED MY ISLAND ^#^**?

Welcome to Russia!!!